How to overcome the fear of negativity from people


Ok, so this is a bit of a more personal topic, and a rather vague title so I apologise, but I have a feeling that this will be relevant to many people. Not only myself. But it came to me too write about this, thinking about the way I felt promoting this, and potentially having other people reading this (hopefully aha). As if this starts reaching more, there’s bound to be people who don’t like or apprecriate the content. And that’s fine! I feel with anything that anyone puts out for others to see, whether that’s art, music, food; you name it. But it is only natural that somebody is likely to hate it, and somebody else is likely to love it. I am sure that it’s not only me who is rather petrified when it comes to informing others what we have created, with the anxiety that in-fact everybody is going to hate it!

However for a lot of us, this anxiety doesn’t just occur when we are showing what we have created. It can be much more common, and feel like a constant obstacle, needing to be tackled again and again every day. The worry can crop up whenever trying to communicate with people, thinking that there’s no way that I will ever be good enough for them to consider associating themselves with me. In the past, thinking through every word that has been said by myself and the person, critically thinking that what I have said is wrong, and they’ll think ill of me because of that. Or likewise, me analysing every word they come out with, twisting them in order to convince myself that they dislike me. Then worst of all, being worried in the present moment, making myself sound like even more of a moron.. Which only results in trying to avoid as many people as possible 😦

It is exuasting! I know that each individual, is affected by a fear of negativity in different ways, however being in a place where I have had this much worse, however I am still trying to overcome a lot of self doubt, I want share some personal tips on what I do to reduce this fear. And to realise the negativity is either irrelevant/untrue, or that you can use it in a productive way.

1. Ignore those who don’t really know you

So who knows your true character better; yourself or somebody who has barely anything to do with your life and has happened to call you- I don’t know, a pig or something. It is pretty obvious. When someone who doesn’t know you well is unkind, or you think that they have negative feelings about you, stop and think to yourself;; why would they have these feelings. Often they don’t mean what they say, and they would not want you to feel attacked personally. But if they would, then they must have other reason to behave in that way, as it would be impossible to truly strongly dislike someone that you barely know. Perhaps they’re having issues of their own, or maybe they are too good at displaying their grudges. But just remember that it is not your problem. From experience,, training your mind to think this way, certainly doesn’t happen overnight, and it can be quite tiring, but not as tiring as having to worry about what strangers think.

2. Still take words with a fat pinch of salt

So does the person really mean what they say. Wonder to yourself, why are they being so critical. Perhaps they may marginally dislike you, but sadly people exaggerate what thy mean, and say things they don’t even mean thanks to human nature. So if somebody doesn’t genuinely mean what they say, then why be so upset about it. Why let it get you down? Remember that if the person is saying something and you don’t understand why they are saying it, chances are the person is angry with the world rather than urself So there is not really anything you can do to resolve this. Instead be prepared to realise when someone is being unpleasant for reasons that don’t actually apply to you

3. Use the criticism in a more productive way

So if you receive this negativity or critism form somebody who actually knows you well, and you can actually see why they’re saying what they are saying, then think t yourself, how can I improve myself. I know it can be very challenging to interpret critism as something you can use in order to improve yourself especially is it is said in a nasty way from someone who you don’t like yourself.

4. Ask yourself- Is it all actually in the head

If you feel like the negativity is really getting to you, and really it is a massive concern, perhaps you are thinking worse of it than what it really is. And that is bloody difficult too, and knackering. But with recognising that some of this may be in your own head, may mean you can take the correct steps from here to improve yourself. As sometimes, just that recognition, can help in at least make you realise deep down that you should feel far less worried and negative about yourself, than what you actually feel. And I know this is a million times easier said than done,, but knowing that it is anxiety can maybe help you begin to take the first steps in healing and overcoming fears of people responding to you in a negative way.

5. Finally remember you are your amazing self, and whatever you do, unfortunately there’s going to be at least someone who doesn’t seem to approve.

This way, I suppose its the case of remembering that you are unique, and its best to be yourself, even knowing that you may get a little hate for it. Because you only live this life once, so don’t let someones negativity influence the decisions you take, or making you sso anxious you choose not to do something you would otherwise have loved to do. Being yourself, especially if you feel like a slipper on a pile of shoes, can be especially difficult. As it means you may well have differences with other people, and some may choose to be hostile to this. Nevertheless you are yourself for a reason, and only people who truly know you and yourself know how amazing you are.

So this is it, for the time being. I may choose to make a similar post to this at some other point in time. But I hope that you have enjoyed this one, and that it has possibly been remotely helpful. Also, I apologise for the spelling mistakes, especially if it appears that there’s half of the word missing. Basically if I make a mistake and then come to correct it, often for every new letter I add, it deletes the one in front.

UGH- So annoying!

Victoria X

How I’m currently surviving my A levels


Ayy! So,, its already nearly the 7th and doom and gloom of January and winter will be creeping away from us, and before we know it, it will be spring! Ok, not going to wish my life away. But most of us are probably now past and over the excitement of new year and technically we should have all taken our Christmas trees down by now, therefore all there is to look forward to (apart from spring), is a brand new, long, stressful period of work. Whether that’s studying or like work work. Well I have had my “first day back” already; not as much of an event as it was back in primary school to be fair. But even so, I admittedly felt marginally optimistic when I first woke up, despite being before 7. However as soon as I had ventured as far as my locker this morning, I just really felt like I didn’t want to be there. Well, I’m alright now at least, now it has sunk in. Anyway what I am going to be saying about today, is how I am coping with my own A levels so far. So I shall be sharing my personal experience, with the hope of giving some of you, whether you’re studying for A levels or not, some helpful study tips. As lets face it, I am only in year 12 luckily, but if I don’t take this year seriously,, come year 13, I’m going to be a little bit screwed.

Anyway the tips are as follows:

1. Remember that everything counts

So it can be alright overlooking the A levels for a while, and trying to forget that there’s content that you’ve been taught which you don’t understand and that you are getting like 3 grades below your desired grade for university, however if that happens for too long, eventually we would be in a situation where it would be next to impossible in order to catch up. Then come the end of the course, you’ll either be faced with so much stress that it would be impossible to imagine, or that you couldn’t even hope to achieve what you initially wanted. Therefore I personally count each little test, or assessed piece of homework equally important. And generally, if there is something I don’t understand I will try to get it straight in my head. Now even though its not the most easy or convenient option at this moment in time, it is much better to be working on getting the best now rather than in however many months time. Now for instance, with the exam technique, I very often get that wrong, especially in economics. For example I do one piece on god knows what, productivity or something, and I understood most of the theory but come to the actual sheet- I must have got an E or something. She didn’t give me a grade but it was grim.. Therefore I would rather practise the technique properly now, listening for advice and following the written guidelines, rather than not worry about it for the time being. As with most things A level related, theey don’t happen overnight. So I would rather aim to gradually improve rather than staying the same then just hoping that all of a sudden I will get it. And it does feel like effort, changing the way you write, however realistically it wont take you much longer to do the work, and infact in the long rrun you will probably end up doing it quicker, being much more confident with how to lay it out. The same applies with end of unit tests, as revising at the time is obviously more effort than not, but I would MMUCH RATHER have a stronger understanding of each topic having previously revised, so come A levels, revising each topic shouldn’t be as overwhelming.

2. WORKING during my study periods

Oh my Lord. honestly coming into year 12 and deciding that I would work during all of my frees (apart from the occasional 5th period where I may choose to go home a little bit early), has probably been the best decision that I have made relating to education. So studying for 4 A levels leaves me with about 9 hours of free time at school, where I can either choose to work, or not. And if I didn’t work at al during these, I would be using up an extra 9 hours in my free time. Meaning I would either be staying up to ridiculous times some nights, or I would literally have barely and free time or time to relax. But instead I spend rather little time (currently) studying at home. Furthermore, for me, I find that I am better focused if I am studying at school, as there’s fewer distractions and knowing that I am at school, puts me in the correct mindset to just get on with things rather than spending god knows how long procrastionating. However I know some people find studying at home more beneficial, so maybe it would be better to go home during study periods, or come into school later if you have no periods first thing, if the school allows. Annoyingly it does not for me, because they always make you register, but I think it is possible to make arrangements if you live a long way for example.

3. Ask my teachers for help if there’s anything I’m not sure on

Ok, so this is more of a personal tip for you guys, rather than something I frequently do myself, unfortunately. However I usually find when I do ask for help, I find myself closer to understanding what has been taught, rather than if I don’t. However I know that it can sometimes be difficult to ask the teacher for help in class, even in a small class, due to fears of being laughed at eg (although it’s literally fine, nobody should make fun of anyone for not understanding at this stage, and if they do it is their problem as they seriously need to grow up). So instead of asking a teacher, you could ask other people in your class, and even if they do’t fully understand, sometimes just having that discussion can enable you to figure more things out between yourselves, and have a stronger understanding of the topic afterwards. Also you could ask older friends/siblings who have previously taken the subject for help, or even parents if they have. As sometimes being taught something in a different way, or just going over something, can really make the difference.

4. Having a few nice clothes and/or some items of funky stationery

So you may be thinking, how on earth could this possibly make any sort of difference to my results. And I agree, directly it makes no difference. However it’s motivation. For me, having a nice outfit to wear, can put me in a better mindset for the day, having that extra boost of confidence. And that confidence boost, will obviously put you into a better mindset about yourself so in turn you should give you motivation work related. Stationery can have that similar effect, as just picking out a funky pen, can just give you that boost of essential positivity needed to kickstart the piece of work.

Therefore I think that sometimes the little things really can count. And its good to look at these, rather than just worrying about the big picture constantly, or having no reason to do anything but hate every hour of the A level course.

5. Try my best to enjoy the subjects and lessons

So leading on from me thinking that it’s bad to hate everything regarding A level subjects, for gods sake, try your best to actually have an interest and possibly even get some enjoyment out of these subjects. Okay, so I guess it is a bit late to swap them about now, but hopefully you chose options that you’re interested in.

However I know I sometimes look at learning as more of a chore, than finding interesting stuff out and enjoying it. But then I remember, I have chosen these subjects as I was interested in them, so it’s important to get the best out of all four. So it is easier said than done, but I try to do this by firstly focusing any sort of further reading on the parts of the subjects that interest me most. So I know that all subtopics within the subject are equally important, but if I were to do some further reading, which ”m planning to do, I would most definitely do it on something that I find genuinely interesting, obviously relating to the subject. This would make me remember why I have chosen the subject, and would enable me to get the best out of the subject and would obviously mean that I gain an even greater understanding. Otherwise what is the point of reading up on a part of the subject that you find more dull, unless it is essential. It will just mean you will view the subject in a darker light. I also try to remember how the subject relates to the outer world. So I mainly do humanities, so it is rather easy, but even with something like science. It isn’t just a load of equations on a piece of paper, it’s equations relating to something really cool, probably dominant in the world we are living in- which I would have no understanding on what so ever! But even when I do physical geography, sometimes all this borderline science stuff baffles me, but then I remember that these processes all actually shape the physical world we are living in. I can literally be seen and is changing all the time, and that is pretty cool.

6. Making revision notes as I go (or at least trying my best to do so)

Yeah, so I know it’s a bit boring but I’m trying my best to do this. Lets say i’m kind of half way anyways. But I think it is important to keep up to date with them, and continuously make notes throughout sixth-form, not just when mocks then the real things are approaching. And that is because, come test I want to be able to have notes that make sense and which I can use, rather than having to panic, rush up some notes then barely have any time to revise afterwards. And although it may seem time consuming doing it at the moment, it is better to use a bit of your free time now, rather than waiting until say may half term and being unable to go out at all due to the overload of work facing you. Not to mention being extra tired when coming back to do them.

7 Don’t stress too much

So although its obviously important to work hard, and obviously stress during a levevs can’t really be avoided, it is also important not to get overstressed. That is part of the reason why I prefer to break down my work lo0ad, rather than leaving a large amount to do in rather little time. However even if that happens. What is the use in getting overly stressed out? You b

8. Look to the future for motivation but remember that “when there’s a will there’s a way”

So even though it is important to look ahead to the future and to set yourself goals, in order to retain motivation to work; as well as being able to see the big picture, rather than just feeling like you’re aimlessly, and tirelessly working, it’s simply impractical and unhealthy to take this too far.  Therefore I think it is important to be aware that I’m not necessarily going to get the grades required to end up where I desire.  Instead it is cool to have a few back up plans, and not necessarily have your “dream plan” set in stone, because circumstances can change, although it is still good to have a good idea on your first choice of what to do.  Therefore I currently have a couple of short term back up plans, one being a university with slightly lower grade requirements for my current choice of course (which lets face it, it’s genuinely much more likely I will get these grades rather than the grades for the first choice),, an alternative choice of course that yet again has slightly lower grade requirements, and an apprentice.  Yet if all that fails, i will decide to migrate to some failing seaside town and play music on the streets.  So yeah, I think it is important to have these, so if something fails then it’s not the end of the world, as I have many things to “fall back on”.  Plus it relieves a lot of the current stress, knowing that there’s more than 1 way of getting where I want to go to. 

Also I don’t have my eyes set on one specific career, however I do have a pretty good idea of what I think that I would like to do, though I’m not really sure.  The plus side of this, is that especially if a certain career requires certain grades, you won’t feel so baffled if you feel you can’t achieve these for one reason or another.  Plus like I said, circumstances can change, so feeling comfortable with a range of options is better really.

Now finally, and most in my case most importantly, the worst thing that you can do is compare yourself to other people.  Whether that is your grades, time spent revising or whatever.  At this stage, it’s so important to accept that everyone is going to go down different paths, so to put yourself down due to what someone else gets is literally unnecessary.  As what they get is totally irrelevant, to  what you need and what you want to do.  Furthermore, what’s even worse, is to literally compare your grades to someone else, to make yourself believe that you are not good enough.  Now I was guilty as hell of this, back when I was studying for GCSEs, noticing the numerous amounts of people getting grades higher than my own, and then claiming that they had done “no work”.  I actually felt awful at times because of this.  But my grades turned out alright.  But funnily enough, nowadays this kind of thing doesn’t bother me anywhere near as much.  Something strange must have happened over the summer, making me finally realise that everyone is different, and it is better to be happy with yourself, whilst being happy and supportive of others, whether they get higher or lower grades.  As we are all in the same boat at the end of the day.  Nevertheless I still find myself occasionally having to stop myself from looking at somebody else’s test paper to see how their score compares with my own.

So before I leave this, one las thing I must stress is that in my strong ass opinion, all of us are equal ; whether that’s in talent, creativity or intelligence.  And is most does not look the same on everyone.  We are unique and that is what makes us so amazing. And nothing can measure this, certainly not grades.  There’s so many other factors, which no one could begin to try to measure, that makes each and every one off us as amazing as one another. 

Oh wow.  So I didn’t expect this to finish quite in the way it did, but I’m glad that it did.  It’s so important not to forget your self worth when in a stressful and competitive environment.  Anyway these are my personal guidelines on how to get through this period of time.  Now I hope that someone haas found this helpful; and for anyone doing A levels-

Good luck :))

Victoria x

2020- New year, new decade- my “resolutions”


Okay, so we are at that very strange time off the year, the very start of the year. Infact decade. So Christmas is over, and even the strange time at the end of December after it is over, when nobody knows what to do themselves. And there’s those of us who do not know what day of the week it is or what even is going on so they don’t achieve anything, meanwhile there’s people like myself who just about know but realise that not many people do so we just end up procrastinating, not really counting the last week or so as a valid period of time. But now the next year is upon us, and we all feel its about time to get moving with things. But how? A new year can bring all sorts, the positive, the negative and everything in between. And lots of us are basically trying to become the best versions of ourselves. But how do we do that. Some will spend a mammoth chunk of January in the gym as well as giving up any sort of food that tastes nice, thinking that going from a Christmas pudding to a pile of muscles will make the perfect person to conquer the year. Meanwhile others will buy a membership thingy, before deciding that in January the gym will be packed out, then come February all is forgotten. And then lots of us won’t bother at all, having a strong dislike of “giving up the good stuff” thinking that the point of life is to enjoy it, rather than taking some strict, dire and bleak attitude. So one can therefore emphasise with the view that these resolutions are pretty much hopeless, and unnecessary. Nevertheless I am going to take a different view this year, and onwards! Instead of sticking to some annoying, strict regime, or totally not bothering; I am going to take a different approach where I shall have resolutions which I am going to stick to! However I won’t exactly be working at them overnight. Or like now. I am going to move towards them in a slow and steady way, as the last thing I want is for them to be forged, and come the next month I will have forgotten all about them. So here is a list of my resolutions for this year, and well forever.

1. Have a warmer approach towards people; from family and close friends, allies and acquaintances and strangers. Like I know this sounds a bit clique however I genuinely think that If people were nicer the world would be a much nicer place. But wtf can me, you or anybody actually do? So it is rather likely we are already nice to friends and family generally. However sometimes people fall out, and the cause and effects of this can be awful. But think to yourself; do we really mean half of the unpleasant things we say. And is it really necessary to let issues stem from one minor occurrence. Now I’m not exactly perfect, I am pretty good at building up grudges against certain people, for pretty petty reasons. Like even if I don’t say anything, having unnecessary anger lets say towards certain people is rather unhealthy, and obviously once we open our mouths it becomes a lot worse… And it works a bit like that vise versa too. Sometimes I like someone, and want to say something positive, but my lazy, socially anxious, introverted ass tells me not to. Which isn’t good. Now regarding strangers it is much easier for me to make a difference in a way, not having to worry about the bricks needed to build a relationship. Therefore one tiny, nonpersonal act can make such a huge difference. That can be giving a homeless person a bit of change for a coffee, donating some noodles to a food bank, or volunteering for half an hour at a local charity shop. I am the queen of forgetting to do things, but I’m going to try not to and remember that doing one tiny thing to help can make a collosal difference to someone else.

2. Do more cool shit- and have the confidence to to so

So this is also something that I really want to do for new year. Now I think that too often, we are reluctant to put ourselves forward, thinking that we aren’t good enough, or not wanting to tread too far into the unknown. But that is rubbish. You are good enough! And the only way you can really find out if something is for you or not, is by trying. Logically thinking, you only get one life therefore if theres something you want to try, then bloody go for it! Therefore I want to do as much as I can this year, without the worry of “not being good enough” because I genuinely don’t want to have lived my life without having done different things enabling me to become a more experienced and well rounded person. As for me, in previous years, I haven’t had the self confidence to do everything that I have wanted to do. Therefore I’ve found myself having to catch up with a lot of it. But for anybody reading this, it is not too late. You have got a brand new year ahead of you and hopefully many many to come, so lets train ourselves to be more self confident and possibly pragmatic.

3. Be more happy inside my body, without the emotional exuastion of constantly comparing myself to others.

Okay, this too is rather misleading. But having struggled with body image in the past and worrying about whether I eat enough, too much or whatever, I want to continue going down the path of putting these thoughts behind and instead tuning into my body, at all times. Now generally I do this already, however I still often find myself comparing myself to others, and it is bloody emotionally exhausting. But at the end off the day, why should I worry about other people. No bodies are alike, therefore I should appreciate mine and treat it accordingly, rather than assuming it is wrong for me to be doing that because of how other people choose to treat theirs, if that makes sense. I might start doing a little bit more exercise too, not for the wrong reasons, but because I benefits the body in many ways and more importantly the mind. For me, I find that exercising can release a lot of nervous energy plus it enables me to be better focused. However I will still listen to my body, and try to know when enough is enough. As well I will try to eat slightly more healthily, but there is no way that I’m going to be cutting anything out (well apart from meat which I do anyways, but that’s a different ball game) Now by doing this, I am taking better care of myself and there’s many other ways to do this, apart this way. For you, taking better care of yourself may look totally different. But I think it is important for everyone to try to do more in order to look after themselves, as well as just others.

So here it is, my “happy new years message”, for what it is worth. But I do think that resolutions do not have to be made overnight but can instead take time. In fact, personally I think that aiming to start acting differently, or giving something up just like that overnight, is usually pretty useless as it just becomes so difficult to stick to. However if we see this as a long term aim, rather than some crazy, strict, hard to stick at obsession; I think that it is so much likely that we will achieve something in the long term. As opposed to something lasting a few weeks, then being forgotten about. So I do think that it’s best to see new years as being a time of reflection, and setting ourselves goals and challenges, and I think that this way we can slowly become a better version of ourselves and lead a better life. That’s in spite of the challenges and the ups and downs that the new year may also deliver.

So I do hope that everyone does have a good new year, and things run as smoothly as possible. So here’s to a new decade!

Victoria x

How to survive Christmas


Ok, so I know that a lot of people would lo0k at this title and think to themselves, “oh I love Christmas, best time of the year. I love spending time with my family, eating lots of food and giving and receiving presents”. However sadly it isn’t like that for everyone. In fact I think there are lots of people out there who secretly dread Christmas, or at least don’t particularly look forward to it. And there are obvious reasons for this, I don’t need to go through them all. However I want to make it clear that you are not alone, Christmas isn’t exactly my favourite time of the year either. So here are some tips on how to get through it X

1. Arrange to see friends, or family you won’t be seeing on Christmas day either before or after Christmas.

So even on the day would be cool, although I know that when we are away, or even if we are at home with a massive load of family who we don’t get on with surrounding us, it is impossible to “get away” on the day, however being able to look forward to seeing others surrounding Christmas time, can be really helpful. Meeting with people before Christmas can give you something to look forward to during the run up to Christmas, especially a couple of weeks before (I’m sorry, i’m too late), when everyone is going on about what they do at Christmas. Like Christmas day may suck but least there’s other people you can see before then, which may make the period of time; well- suck a bit less. Also it can put you in a better frame of mind on Christmas day, especially if you’re seeing the sort of people who are really good at lifting your mood. This way, it should put you in a more positive mindset on the day, so your mindset is less likely to go downwards as far.

Then seeing friends after the “day of doom” can also make things a little bit more bearable, by giving you something to look forward to on that particular day. I think that having something nice to look forward to shortly after Christmas which isn’t work or school, can be so beneficial! As it will enable you to focus on that, rather than focus on the negative vibes that Christmas day is giving off.

2. Go to a Christmas related event in your local area

Thiss can be a genuinely uplifting experience. For me, just going around and looking at the lights around Bournemouth gardens puts me in the “festive spirit”. Because not only I am able to appreciate the arrangement of the lights, but it reminds me that Christmas isn’t just about what happens about the day. But what happens around that time. And it makes me remember that there are great things to see and do relating to Christmas, which definitely don’t just take place on Christmas day!

I also think that getting involved in Christmas carols, whether that’s being in the choir yourself, watching others, or going to a thing where everyone has to sing lol can be a great way of bringing people together and putting everyone in the Christmas spirit. Where you also realise that the day itself is not the only part of celebrating Christmas. In fact I genuinely prefer the run up to Christmas tot Christmas day itself, even though I don’t exactly dread Christmas day these days. And I reckon that even if I did get lodes of presents (which I don’t) the same would still apply.

3. Remember the “true meaning of Christmas”

So I think that for anyone who may struggle financially this is important, and for anyone who doesn’t struggle financially this is even more important. This is because Christmas is NOT about receiving gifts, spending hours on end around shops stressing about what to buy for who, and receiving tonnes of usless gifts that you’re probably only going to use like once or twice. Instead traditionally it is a religious event. And I know that now it has been adopted into our culture as more of a materialistic thing. However, not being religious myself, I accept that it is now part of our culture but I most certainly don’t believe that it is now just an event where people buy then receive plasticy gifts for the sake of it. In fact I think it is extremely ssad how so many kids only sseem to get excited over their presents.

So instead I believe it is a time of reflection, celebration, and relaxation. And who you spend that time with should be up to you and it doesn’t have to be done on the day itself if that is difficult. So don’t count the tangible gifts, count the memories, achievements and the difficult times of the previous year and bring hope to the year coming.

4. Try to be optimistic, but no pressure

As previously said, Christmas should be a time of reflection rather than a time of obsessing over money blah blah blah. However, what if there is not much positive things to reflect upon. For people who have had a bad year, a period of reflecting on the year, and having to pretend to be happy is the last thing that you want. However think this way. Out of everything bad that happens, something good must bloom! Now I know this is still hard thinking like this. However one sort of positive thing you get after going through shit, is becoming a stronger person. Think about how resilient you are now, compared tot this time last year, lets say. I know it’s not always easy to think like this, but it is true. When we go through a difficult time, we don’t really have much choice apart from putting up with it, then getting through it. And if you have had a difficult year, this is literally what you have done! Inevitably, after putting yourself though a rough time, yoou will turn out a stronger person. Like it or not! And just think, what is this strong, boss ass person going to be able to achieve the following year due to getting through the time that has just come. Come on. Nott every year has to be bad does it.

5. Work towards something

Yep. So surly Christmas should be a break right? Yes of course. But when you are having a really shitty time, it is nice to be able to feel that you are working towards something positive. It can act as a reason to feel good about yourself and positive about the coming year, as well as being a distraction. Now it doesn’t matter what that thing is. Whether is is a Christmas DIY like a paper snowflake, baking or a more long term goal. Now doing something short term, will most certainly be the break you need from day to day work and life, whilst you will feel more accomplished by doing something positive with your time. Meanwhile working on a more long term goal, may make you feel better about yourself not just on the day, by taking another step to what you are working towards, but in the new year, having gone a bit further on the task that you never usually have time for. Now I know that can be quite strenuous, and for some it is better just to chill. But if you find yourself “bored” around Christmas day, and maybe needing distractions, this may well help.

6. Distractions

So this is an extremely broad topic, but this is basically what it says on the tin. If things are difficult, try doing something else. Whether this is for yourself or for other people. It basically gives your mind another place to be, instead of just the shit you are getting on the day.

7. Write a new years “Bucket list”

So if you’re not feeling particular optimistic about this time of year or about the year that’s just come by, then why not write a list of things that you would like to do in the new year. Nott only will it take your mind off what is going on right now, it will also put you in a more positive mindset about the following year. As realistically Christmas time is just a few days in the year, and what happens most of the time is more important. And as there is nothing you can do about the past, then why not play your part in making the next year as good as it can be.

7. Help out the family or whoever with the chores

So I know it sounds boring, and rather like a chore if you are going to be with family who don’t seem to appreciate you or vise versa. However just think how much they may appreciate a little help with cutting up all of the vegetables for the Christmas dinner. A rather straight forward taks may be immensely helpful to whoever is cooking the dinner, and it can be rather distracting and time consuming for you.

7. Help others eg volunteering

So if you are literally alone for Christmas ( sending a massive massive virtual hug. I love you so much and you have got this) or if you just want to help the less fortunate, then this is a perfect idea. Any sort of volunteering is so so helpful, and can literally change a persons Christmas time experience. Working in an establishment that provides free Christmas food for the homeless, may not change the world. But it will change those people’s world’s for that day at least. Just having 1 more person helping, means that this one person will be able to have a chat with many different people. Which like I say, isn’t going to have any long term effect on the world, but just think for one person who may not talk to anybody on Christmas day, talking to just one person can have a massive massive improvement. Furthermore if you are helping people who are homeless, you are contributing to providing shelter, nourishment and social time for so many people. It is such a lovely thing to do, and a brand new experience. And if you are struggling with Christmas, whatever type of person you are helping, you may be able to establish something in common. A struggle for Christmas is a start. The may be able to provide you with brilliant advise and guidelines. As at the end of the day, they are humans. Just like you and me

7. Go for a walk

Honestly just getting outside and moving a little can have some positive impact on the way you feel. Now we have all heard about how good “fresh air and exercise” can be for you, and its ttrue. So I understand when you are really feeling down, realistically the last thing you want to do is get up and go for a walk. However it can prevent you from feeling too low. For me, it really can distract as I am able to appreciate the nature and what else there is going on outside, rather than focus on my own life. As well, it is a safer place to reflect on the past and the future in a more positive way. Also it enables you to get away from the bother of it all:)

9. Alchol

WOW, so after all these relatively healthy coping mechanisms i’ve suggested, I decide to go and put alcohol. Rolls eyes. Ok, so I know that is far from the best choice on what to do. But lets face it. We are humans, we aren’t always going to choose what is typically “best”. And lets faced it, when we feel most down, we aren’t exactly going to do a bit of yoga down the park, before making a start on our project that we were intending on beginning, the following year. No of course not. However I don’t really think it’s that bad to have a drink. It can put us in a better, more relaxed mood and take us away from the emotional exhaustion of Christmas. So yeah it’s not great. But think about it… Drink at 5, bed at 11? That is 6 hours of peace.

7. Remember it is not that important

So after having to hear all the fuss about Christmas, coming from like literally everyone you know, you’re bound to feel rather overwhelmed that Christmas is right on your doorstep. So I think it would be nice, if sometimes people could just shut up about it. But honestly, in the scheme of things it is not that important. There are many other times of the year that we can look forward to, whether that’s spring time, April fools or obviously summer! When people don’t shut up about it, it is usually because they are stressed, and stress is not a good thing and they can’t really be having the most excellent time if they are stressed out of their minds now, can they? And with regards to the shops, it is all just a fat money making exercise. Hence why when you walk into a shop any time after Halloween, all you are able to spot is christmasy shit.

So yeah, it really isn’t that important. Just stay strong, you can get through these few days. Message me if you feel lost.

Sending love

Victoria Xx

General election rant (sort of)- Why I think the results turned out the way they did


Okay, so before I start, I’m not going to be using this as a platform to spread my own political views (at this moment in time) however I want to be able to post political content without it sounding too bias towards one party or the other if that makes sense.

So here we go, this is why I think that the results were the way they were.

So firstly you may be aware, even though Boris won a rather impressive “majority”, it doesn’t mean that the majority of the population, or at least the people who voted, actually voted for him. In fact they would have only won 288 seats under a proportional representative system, compared to 406 which they won under first past the post (basically “first past the post” is where the MP with the largest number of votes per area or constituency is elected, but they don’t need a majority). So that goes to show. Whereas smaller parties like the Greens and the Liberal Democrats won fewer seats in comparison to the number of overall votes. So this basically just shows how badly our politics is actually represented in parliament. However, considering that the conservatives still did get the highest number of votes compared to any other party (only they didn’t actually get a majority) why on earth did so many people vote for them?

Now some people, including Lily Allen believe it was due to “racism and misogyny running so deeply in our country”. Now is he a racist? Personally I wouldn’t say so however he has come out with some comments, of which some would call unforgivable whilst others would label as “banter”. Now I don’t know. As a journalist writing for mainstream newspapers like the telegraph you don’t just say these things, regardless on whether you mean it as a joke or not. As it is obvious some people will take offence. It is like with anything; if you know someone well knowing they won’t take offence, then it is ok to say something like that. But you don’t write something like that in a news paper millions of people are likely to read. So maybe he did it because he just wasn’t thinking straight, maybe because he didn’t care about any negative publicity it may lead to, or maybe he was sneaky and knew that inspite of the large amount of poor publicity he would get, a huge amount of the public would find his comments entertaining and agree with them. Now I still find the fact that so many people would have voted for him, based on their racism or dislike towards certain groups of people, considering the number of people I know who were disgusted by these comments. Nevertheless it could be true that people voted for him because of his attitude rather than inspite of it, when I consider the number of “borderline racist” comments that I do here. And that’s just the people who are open about it, and its quite possible that there’s a lot more people who have this attitude towards it secretly. So perhaps these comments did help him in the long run. As deep down people agree and I’m confident that there’s a few people out there who believe in his comments more than he does himself. However I still struggle to believe that he did get SO MANY votes for these reasons. There has always been racism going on in the UK, and I genuinely don’t know whether it’s actually got worse recently as I haven’t been around for long enough. But I just cant believe this has been the main reason.

Okay so another reason is obviously…. you wait for it…..yup here it is. Brexit (inserts laughing emoji which I can’t actually do because I am typing from a laptop). So I do think genuinely that an aweful lot of people who wanted to leave the EU would have been put off from voting from the labour party, even though the labour party is pretty split on Brexit. And infact many traditional supporters of Labour are pro remain, but many are pro leave. However Corbyn decided to take a “neutral stance” on Brexit when it finally came to it. So part of the results could be down to people, especially from up north, wanting to leave the EU and despite their previous support for Labour, they just didn’t believe that they would be able to take us out of the EU. This especially goes for the north east and some of the midlands, where the “leave vote” tended to dominate, however traditionally in lots of these areas people voted labour rather than conservative. However if you compare a map of the UK, showing the election results in 2017 compared to 2019, you will find that the clumps of red have shrunk in these areas, as some of the labour MPs have lost their seats in constituencies in these areas. Now this implies that people are literally voting to “get Brexit done”. This can also can be seen as the “Brexit party”, despite not getting many seats, they still got an impressive number of votes. Now this pretty much suggests that people living in these areas are fed up of their situation, seeing that back in the 80s many mines were closed in these areas, and very little industry up there has seemed to replace that. Now I personally don’t know how Brexit could make that situation any better or worse, being brutally honest I don’t understand the economic effects of Brexit, and in a matter of fact does anyone truly understand what is actually going to happen? Probably not. But I can understand how people crave change, and feel that staying in the EU will not achieve this, even though the same “tired old” party might.

Now I think the final possible reason that the tories did so well, is that people aren’t liking the Labour party. For many reasons… First some may be aware of past connections the leader has had/has with some terrorism organisations. and I think people are genuinely concerned about what he could have done if he had become prime minister. And to be fair, people have a good reason to be anxious. And the second issue is with the suspected antisemitism going on within his party. I think it is fair to say it has become a genuine issue by looking at the number of MPs who have shown concern including Luciana Berger stating that she had become ashamed of the party that she joined as a teenager and the 9 MPs who quit the party back in February. Where many sited Corbyns handling of antisemitism the reason for why they left. Now I know there’s not exactly millions and millions of Jews living here in the UK, but I think any Jewish person has the right to be extremely worried, like wise your average nice person who opposes all types of discrimination. So that could be part of the reason. If you are genuinely want everybody to be more equal, then surly you would strongly oppose any types of racism. So it is also quite possible that people who would have ppreviously voted labour, just couldn’t bring themselves to vote in this election. This is sort of proven by a slight drop in turnout compared to 2017, with just 67.3% which is about 1.5% less than previously. In fact, my Gran, having told me she’s been voting labour consistently all her life, didn’t vote in this general election.. Even though many times she was offered a postal vote to be arranged for her. And she says the Labour party now, isn’t the same party she knew it as, therefore she just couldn’t bring herself to vote labour. Or tory. However it is very likely other people who have been voting labour for a great deal of their lives have switched now to conservative, for this reason. Meanwhile a vote for any other party with this system, would easily be regarded as wasted.

So the final issue about Labour, is the rather ambitious, but controversial manifesto. So I personally strongly approve of it on a moral basis however it doesn’t mean that I believe it would work practically. Okay, so providing everyone with free broadband, spending immense amounts of money on the NHS and of course enabling people to have “4 day weeks” when currently it’s a 5 day week but we all know that realistically many people are working 6 or 7 days just to make a living! So it’s perfect morally, people have more time for themselves, the NHS won’t be fucked and lets face it, in the 21st century broadband is a necessesity. However the typical question asked by people who like to take the piss out of Labour is: “where will they get all the money from?”. And it is a very good question. Raising taxes for the “rich” and big businesses alike sounds like the obvious answer to me, however if the taxes are raised too much then these people will get pissed off and would be quite likely to leave the country. Which I believe is very sad. It just shows how humanity as a whole is greedy and selfish, or at least has these tendencies. It is extremely sad, but it is the world we are living in. So other ways of raising revenue is to get people to avoid tax dodging, which a huge number of large businesses do. Which I think this policy would be an excellent way of raising revenue and would definitely be worth a try. But even then, you don’t know how likely it would be for people to leave. So this kind of explains why people like myself don’t believe it would work.. I also believe that he (Corbyn) did admit that he wouldn’t JUST raise tax for the rich, but he would do so for other groups of people too. Quite possibly because he knew that. Therefore I think that people are worried that they won’t get their fair share of extra expenditure. Annd economically it won’t be affective as it will leave more people with less disposable income. So there’s less of the spend spend thing. So basically people don’t want communism. So that was a bit of a rant but I hope it explains why I don’t think that Labour are becoming mor unpopular. Because people aren’t liking their policies, as they either believe they’ll be ineffective, or unfair on themselves. Which I suppose there’s an element of selfishness to it, but also a huge element of fear.

So I am going to leave it at that. It was a bitt of a long rant, and I am very aware that I don’t have lots of knowledge on this and some of what I’m saying may be inaccurate. But it’s basically just my views on this…

Christmas sucks!


Hellooo, I’m the most disorganised, disorientated person out there so I have come onto here, without much of an idea on what to write.

previously I was wanting to rant about how Halloween is actually alright and about how trick or treaters aren’t all planning to frighten all the old ladies in their village.. However I left it a bit late didn’t I. Haha.

So instead I will rant about how I personally think Christmas is the most overrated time of the year and about how we always prep for it far too early.

So first things first, If you are reading this between now and December the first and you have a little sense, you are probably thinking why the hell is she ALREADY posting about Christmas. And yes you are spot on! It is far too early, and I need to get a bloody life.

But in actual fact there are two very good reasons why I am choosing to post about this.

Firstly because I know that if I don’t do it now, I will be sat here like a muppet in February thinking “oh shit, I wanted to post a rant about Christmas, but its a little late for that now”. And secondly, lets face it. Already lots of people are talking about Christmas, getting unnecessarily hyped up for it. And if I just walk down the street, I am going to be bombarded with gimmicy lights dazzling in my face. Not to mention the fact that pretty much all mainstream shops have been selling Christmas stuff ever since Halloween ended, which I can understand why they do that. And the fact they’ve already tarted up Bournemouth gardens, with a load of fake lit up Christmas trees (I can certainly understand why they have done that:/ ). It looks quite nice to be honest, but come December the 25th, does anyone actually feel christmasy?

So this is why I feel Christmas is overrated.

1. It’s a money making excersise

So like I said a minute ago, shops need to make money. And when does a better opportunity arise than Christmas? But I think some people, especially children these days are more excited about that than anything else. When I was younger, I remember getting all over excited gazing through shop windows at all this crappy technology, thinking how much better my life would be if I had some of this stuff. Then come Christmas day, sod the family and the dinner, all I was interested in were the presents! And i’m sure other kids are the same, in fact they’re probably worse now. Whereas in previous generations even middle class kids would only get like… an orange. Now sadly even though I am older and i recognise this is shit, I haven’t changed. Despite the fact now i’m not greeted with a sack full of presents on Christmas day ( too old for that, being almost 17 ugh), if i look in a shop window and see like a pretty dress which I may look half acceptable in automatically I am drawn to it. As well as if I see makeup, stationary, chocolate or even the kitchen sink. There’s no doubt about it, I’m a materialistic person and I love money. But least I recognise there’s more than that to life. but that’s what its encouraging nowadays , materialism…

2. More importantly unfairness and inequality

So One thing that I can’t really imagine as fortunately I have never bee through it, is being in the situation where you literally cannot afford to celebrate at all. No turkey (ha fine with me i’m veggie anyways), no cute lil gifts, no Christmas pudding. But no food, no warmth possibly, no where nice to sleep. It is tragic. And I don’t know but for people in these situations, the thought of everyone celebrating may lead them to feel worse about themselves and their own lives. I know that lots of people do help these people at these times of years though, which is very positive. But what is questionable is tthat, should we all be making more of a considerable effort to help these people in need, before indulging ourselves. Myself included…

3. Broken families

So everyone’s situation is different, but there’s nothing more frustrating for a young child than having to worry about what is going to happen with their family over Christmas time. The fuss made over Christmas likewise is especially unhelpful, and maybe slightly leess fuss over Christmas would be nice to make things run more smoothly. as whatever happens matters less. So less stress on the poor kid. Problem sorted! Well sort of not really. But it may help. Also lots of people may not have families to go to, or may have to pretend to like everyone that they have to see, whereas in reality by the end of the day they want to kick everyone out of the room, and just stay in with the cat! Yeah it sucks.

So now hopefully you can see why I personally see a lot of reasons why Christmas may not be as good as its often hyped up to be. Now don’t get me wrong, there’s positives which come out of some of these too. Christmas doesn’t have to be all bad. No, its all chocolate and sparkles or whatever.

In fact I think I will try to produce a list of positive aspects about Christmas. But that will HAVE to be after December the first!

Why I think all 16-18 year old collage/sixth form students as well as apprentices should be provided with a basic understanding of politics


Hi, so I originally wrote this to send to the BBC’s “young reporters competition”. Now if technology lets me, I still will do. At the very last minute I expect, as that’s what tends to happen, when I face anything technological. Anyway here it is…….

Do you find it shocking that a survey, carried out by the ONS in 2014, found that 42.5% of 16-24 year olds stated that they had no interest in politics? Compared to just 21% for over 65s. You might well be thinking this is because we are just choosing not to take interest. However I would strongly disagree. Considering that there’s been a general trend over many years, showing a smaller proportion of the younger generation have voted in events such as general elections compared to the older generations, there must be a reason why. Now I feel the lack of factual, unbias information readily available to us plays a huge role in this; leaving us afloat to slowly gain a reasonable understanding over many years.  Therefore I feel that any 16-18 year old student or apprentice should be provided with a curriculum which gives us a basic understanding of the political system as well as an insight into our ever changing political climate. This wouldn’t be an examined subject, but instead a few hours per school year.

To begin with, it goes without saying that if we were educated, we would be transferring a much more informed and educated response onto our ballet papers. Which would also correspond with our personal views a lot more. As well, people who would otherwise choose not to vote, would be much more likely to show up and would likewise give an educated response.  Therefore this would not only raise our political awareness, but it would reduce the gap between the proportion of younger and older voters.  Now concerningly this gap may have influenced results in previous general elections and referendums, which would have been unfair to our own as well as previous younger generations. Most recently however, take the B word “Brexit”.  A much larger percentage of the younger voters chose to stay in, in comparison to older voters who voted the same way. Nonetheless there was a much lower turnout of younger voters. Now is it really fair to us that results of this and potentially future referendums will be influenced this way?  Really the only way forward is to educate us so that we are more aware of the potential consequences or benefits of decisions that we have been given the right to make. Thinking in about in the distant future, all electrodes would have been taught basic political knowledge.  Just consider where this may take our country in the future.

Furthermore our generation are being bombarded with bias, inaccurate and even false information. And the amount of this we face is only going to get higher.  The average person now aged 16-24 spends shocking 34.3 hours on the internet a week. This way we are inevitably going to come across a huge number of online articles and videos which could therefore potentially influence our views in a superficial way.  As well we are much more subject to views held by certain “celebrities”. Just by aimlessly scrolling through our twitter feed we are becoming more and more informed on the views of people like Russel Brand.  Instead of alternatively gaining an understanding of the topics he may hold these views on. Moreover what I’m most concerned with is the rise of “fake news”. Due to the rise of the internet, it has become easier and easier to publish false information, which many people would just assume was true. Unlike in a mainstream tangible newspaper: where if anything false about a person was published, they could be sued, the internet is much harder to control. Therefore a lot of false articles go unnoticed, nevertheless make us believe these stories which may lead us onto developing bias views towards certain topics or groups of people.  Now on the country, you may argue that a teacher would be more likely to preach their personal views to the class, rather than teach us from a neutral perspective. However as an A level politics student, I found that both my teachers are excellent at delivering the subject to us in an informative and neutral manner.  I’m also aware that in a classroom environment it would be likely for there to be a range of views held by some people. Nevertheless being exposed to this wide range, we will have the opportunity to consider these different perspectives and finally develop more balanced educated opinions.

Finally just consider how relevant politics is to us today! What with our forever changing political climate that our country and the world is in, as well as the smaller things which may not be covered on the news as much. These will effect everyone on a day to day basis.  For instance just think of how much things could change for Great Britain and Europe if we end up leaving the EU.  Surly as a citizen of any country, it’s essential to have some basic knowledge on how their country is as a nation and how this may be changing! We also need to know what decisions the parties that we choose to vote for would be making on our behalf.  Whether this is to cut tuition fees to give students from normal working families a better chance of going to university, to increase pensions so that elderly people experience  a more comfortable retirement in which they deserve or a higher amount of spending on mental health services.  It is only fair that we know how the decisions we make may affect us, our parents and our grandparents.  However it’s not only economic decisions that are effected by politics.  Politics dominates issues that our planet as whole if facing; from issues including feminism, the threat of terrorism and of course the climate change crisis!  Now a huge number of people, if not everyone is affected by these issues and there are in fact many young people out there who do take a very strong interest! Just look at the accomplishments of people like 16 year old Greta Thunberg who has inspired over 6 million people, mainly school and collage students, to partake in peaceful climate change protests in order to raise awareness. Perhaps as we are the generation to currently be effected the most. Now heavily implies that we are only more than eager to get involved in global issues.  Therefore if we were all educated then we would all be wanting to get involved in other political areas as well. 

To conclude: I hope that from this you can see why I think that a basic education for older students should be essential.  Votes would be more informed, so results in the future would reflect our opinions more. It would also lead to a significant increase in voter turnout of the youngest age group meaning a closed gap between the proportion of younger and older voters, as well as a significant rise in votes, enabling our democratic system to flourish.  Finally we can’t forget how important politics really is to everyone and how it effects us even if we don’t necessarily realise. Therefore you should be able to see why providing us with political education for just a couple hours a year, would certainly not be a waste of our time or our country’s resources. 

Wow, I feel like I have just written some persuasive writing essay for GCSE English, or some low standard A level essay for god knows what subject here. Anyway, its not exactly top notch standard, but I do genuinely hope you can see why I think everyone should be taught politics.

Seriously though. Half the people who do end up voting at elections, probably have no real idea or understanding themselves, having just been fed on if any, then bias information. Seriously though, it wouldn’t kill.

I have also noticed this and my last entry have been extremely school related. SO SO sorry. I promise that my next entry won’t be. Hopefully it will be a little more exciting haha.

GCSEs: The experience with the new system from an average(ish) teen


Edit: So I’ve been trying to post this and edit this for AGES, and it’s now the 20th of October and I’m just coming to post this (hopefully). And this is due to wordpress being horrifically slow on my laptop. So I’ve edited some of this just now. Anyway, please try to enjoy my rant about GCSEs.

Well it is that time of year again; September. Back to school, work, collage, or even university.

And it is also that time of year where some of us will have had those exam results back rather recently. You would have dealt with the dielemna of whether you have done “well enough” to move forward to where you want to go next with life, foreshadowing the actual opening of the envelope.

So ok; by now we all know. We are either very pleased that our results have enabled us to take the next step forward towards our dream career, or that we would be in the middle of finding a path around it. A plan B or a different road towards plan A. Honestly when there’s a will there’s a way. Theres no reason to stress. Rant over with!

Anyway this isn’t the point. My point is that, at least within my school environment, there are so many people who are no longer satisified with sufficient grades. Instead we are becoming increasingly obsessed with being the best. Having a set of numbers which are as high as possible. They look pretty on the page, define how good you are, and supposing they show how good you will be at a subject in a few years time. As if the stress of A levels and the outcome of them, as well as anything extra curricular doesn’t show enough. Hence the 9. The new A**. Supposingly they enable the “strongest candidates” to stand out more to the top universities. However are they really necessary?

Firstly I strongly feel that what is more important is what you are like as a person and how driven you are. So I understand that grades do show this up to an extent. Very high grades indicate the person has put in a lot of time and effort into their studies. And also hopefully an exceptionally high grade in a particular subject would imply that this person may have a strong passion for it. But is a 9 really necessary? It has become known to me that often people who achieve the top grades at GCSE level don’t necessarily do as well at A level stage, whereas those who don’t get such impressive grades at GCSE go on to do exceptionally well at A level. Thinking about that this way, leaves me unable to see any logical reason why the GCSE grading system needed tto be amended.

Furthermore people panick in exams. We mess up and make mistakes which we wouldn’t make under less stress and more time. And some people panick more than others.

So fair enough. If you went to a decent school i’m sure you’ve seen the specification for each individual question enough times. Therefore I imagaine that there would be people who could glance at that then majestically know exactly what to write. In any subject, not just English. Meanwhile other people would take one look, and probably be more confuzzled than before. As for some of us, its not exactly clear what the examiner wants, regardless of how many times we have seen the specification. So theres a skill, not directly related to any subject. Spotting exactly what an examiner wants. UGH! So usually anyone who is good at a subject is likely to get a higher mark. Nevertheless those people who are somehow able to organise themselves in a way that they can write the exact words the examiner wants to read, and happen to be good at that subject will stand a much higher chance of achieving that top 9 than somebody who is good at the subject but doesn’t have that strange skill. In addition, it is unfair to somebody who hasn’t seen this specification. They may not know it is accessible. They may not care that much. But they are still at a disadvantage. And I think that the more grades that are available, thee more important it is to know what the examiner wants if you want to achieve that top, in my opinion unnecessary, grade. So that advantage of being shown this specification, as well as having the ability to see through it and write to the examiners preference ((which may vary in any case) puts certain people at a great advantage. And the ability to do this, is not the same as having a great ability in a certain subject. UGHH!

Furthermore higher grades available leads to: higher stress, higher expectations and lower self esteem.. Now I went to a school where i knew a lot of people who were expecting 9s. Lots of bloody 9s. If they got an 8 instead,, they would feel awful about it and themselves. Now i think they worked extremely hard to achieve these top marks but i know for a fact there were people who accomplished that. Unfortunately some people are perfectionists, so anything that’s not top isn’t good enough. Nonetheless I asked someone in this boat, and they agreed that having these top grades available was actually unnecessary. Even though they achieved top grades themselves. Therefore I think that really, the availability of 8s and 9s doesn’t put these types of people at much of an advantage. Instead it means they are under more pressure and more stress, which could potentially put their mental health at risk. And I have seen this myself…

I personally reckon part of this is to make certain schools stand out against the so called “mainstream” ones. Enabling private schools to boast about their grades, so they stand out. Now that isn’t putting their pupils under any advantages, its putting them at considerable stress in my opinion. Giving them ridiculous expectations to live up to. Whilst it potentially puts the rest of us at another disadvantage. In fact I stumbled across an article which implied some private school was thinking they should introduce a “10” as so many students of theirs were getting 9s. All I can say is WTF!

Now what about the rest of us? People who don’t get 9s and who don’t really want them? If this system only effects such a small number of people in reality, then why is it such a bad thing. Surly everyone else is just under the same level of stress as previously, whilst the “most able” students can reach out for those top grades. A complete dream for most of us. Well from my experience this is not the case. At this point in time, I would happily stand on the top of a building and shout “I DIDN’T GET ANY 9s” because well, I didn’t. And it no longer matters to me. But there were times when I felt terrible, absolutely useless. Whilst the teachers would be teaching the “brightest kids” the grade 9 standard stuff, I would still be at there, looking completely dazed at something more my sort of level, afraid to ask the teacher for help at times as I thought it was assumed by everyone that I would have understood the more “basic” stuff already. And its true, loads of people would be aiming for this highest standard, getting the highest grades. And I mean good for them. Meanwhile I would say complete rubbish about my self such as “I’m going to fail everything”. Or “I’m rubbish at this subject, I’m rubbish at everything. Why am I even trying” Or just calling myself a “shit show”. Complete nonsense. But I’m sure there’s many other hardworking teenagers out there, eager to pass. Or get a high pass or whatever. But feeling they’re just not good enough. Since when was a 5, a high c/low B perceived as a “rubbish grade”. When it is a strong pass. Meanwhile it seemed like everyday I would hear people moaning they “only” got a 6. A B. Or even dissing themselves for getting 7s. Once upon a time a 7 was an A (well it still is lol). But now there’s two grades above it? GCSE exam questions are undoubtedly becoming harder and harder, hence why I literally couldn’t cope with nearly half of my maths paper, but I got a grade that I am pleased with. And don’t even get me started on science! grrrrr

So, my rant on education is over with. Until next time haha! The point is the new GCSE system is too much stress for everybody, is now apparently making marking more inaccurate hence why so many people have had their papers remarked, and also it doesn’t really mean anything.

Views on pride and LGBT+ rights


Hii, so I haven’t been on here for a LONG time; so much for saying that I would update this every week from some time in January?

Well unfortunately that was mainly because I was so caught up with GCSEs (sigh), which looking back on them now, I feel that they were almost consuming me. But I will get onto that in another entry.

Anyway, I thought that for this entry, I would express some of my views on pride, since my local one just happened this previous weekend.

So first of all, i am supportive of LGBT+ rights. Ok, I just thought i would clear that.

But i shall start on pride. I sadly didn’t actually attend this year but I went last year. So last year (and I’m pretty sure it was the same this year), there was meant to be entertainment from Friday onto Sunday. So on the Friday night it was basically the evening entertainment and live music that under 18 were allowed to attend ass well as everyone else. And it was alright… Then on the Saturday it was the standard parade, followed by everyone just hanging out afterwards. Now crazily enough i got to be in the parade, only because I was (and still am….) a member of a LGBT+ youth group. Now at the time I really really enjoyed it because it was the first pride I had been to. The colours were beautiful: there was plenty of multicolour balloons, face paint and glitter. Not to mention the flags which were pretty much in every pub, or bar window. What more could you want? Well, if it was just down to the atmosphere at pride, i would have certainly come again. But my personal experience wasn’t the best, not going to lie.

So nothing actually happened, but I just felt like an outsider there, as i was surrounded by all these people from this group, but none of my actual friends were in it.. Plus none of my other so called friends at the time invited me to go. I mean fair enough 😥

Hence why i didn’t choose to go this year. However if that is still the case in two years on from now, when im old enough to go during the Saturday evening, ill just turn up anyway. Who cares lol.

So another thing that everyone went through was the anti gay protesters there. So I didn’t hear anything about them this year; perhaps they didn’t go or just that no one noticed them. However they were basically holding up bible quotes, which imply that us gays don’t have rights. So they were just stood, hanging around. so I guess they had every right to be there… But why cant people just accept others for who they are. Plus I wouldn’t be at all surprised if half of them were secretly gay, aha. In my opinion, if they were true Christians they would be 100 percent accepting; as aren’t they supposed to love everyone. Also why interfere, we weren’t doing any harm to anyone, and many people have been through so much having to worry about whether they’ll be accepted by others (and often that isn’t the case) and having to have been working on accepting them selves, which will probably be life long challenge. So please just let us enjoy the few days we get a year to celebrate how far our rights have come, without bombarding us with pointless opposition. We are harmless beings!

So I am aware arguably that having a whole “pride month” in June is a bit over the top, whilst the veterans in the USA only get one day. And like here in the UK, it is just remembrance day. But with pride month, there is historical relevance to it, which can be googled! But sometimes one day is more powerful than a whole month. Like each year with remembrance, there’s a whole tv show which lasts a number of hours, as well as a two minute silence. And I believe this is extremely important, and needs to go on for ever. Meanwhile, I have never heard about pride month being mentioned on the tv. Therefore one day is more significant, as its peoples only opportunity to commemorate it, whilst when its a month, no one really pays attention as a month lasts between 28 and 31 days. Usually nearer the latter. So i think and hope that most people (discluding the extremely ignorant)always aknowledge the 11th, whilst pride month itself is a time for people to reflect, maybe more in their own times. Whilst the festivle pride is detached from that, as its more of a festival/celebration which anyone can enjoy.

So I appreciate i probably sound like some typical 14 year old ranting on (i’m 16 lol). If there’s any questions anyone wants to ask or if anyone has their own experiences they would like to share then please do so.

Thankyou, V x


Hey, so I have decided I am going to give a better idea on what I’m likely to be putting on here and when, rather than spontaneously uploading random content with no particular timing routine or structure.

Therefore I have decided that every other Monday I shall upload a post to do with mental and emotional health. I think that we all have our own experiences with mental health, whether living with a diagnosed condition or not. I feel like a lot of us still feel isolated, despite there being so many of us going through similar experiences. However we are still feeling the need to suppress our feelings.

Furthermore I believe around my sort of age, we tend to feel most vulnerable so it is important we share our feelings more frequently, to hopefully help everybody.

So the other thing I wanted to do was to do a “rant of the week”; on alternate Mondays to when I post about mental health. This is basically because I enjoy a good moan, and I feel there are plenty of topics to choose from.

So I will also upload other varying content including and life updates or topics (personal), or travel experiences. Hopefully I will be going to Wales after GCSE’s and I’m also doing NCS. I hope to blog about them both…

Wish me luck.
Anybody reading this, take care

Victoria x

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